7. HE JOINED ME IN STEPPING AWAY FROM HIS PHONE. After our chat on Friday, we were both too tired to actually talk about our issue anymore, so we decided to go for a hike over the weekend. Walking and talking has always been one of our favorite ways to solve any problems we might have. We decided on a few important things: no more cellphones in the evening and during meals, and no more texting our whereabouts or other non-urgent things during the day. It would take him a while to get used to it, but we both felt it would help him work on his control issues. He also agreed to find a therapist to talk about his problems.
8. I FELT FREE FOR ONCE. The next day was amazing, not least because the phone company told me I’d have a phone again by Monday. I also hung out with some friends and although my boyfriend was worried and I could see that in his face, he didn’t interrogate me or give me a hard time about it before I left or even after I came home. I never realized his control issues were such a big deal in my life, but even my friends commented that I was so much more relaxed and fun to be around when I didn’t check my phone every 10 minutes.
9. I HAVE A PHONE AGAIN, BUT I ALSO HAVE A BETTER RELATIONSHIP. As agreed, when my boyfriend asks me questions about where I am or who I’m with, I don’t text back. If we’re bored, we look for something to do and don’t text; if we’re running late or need the other to pick up something from the grocery store, it’s fine to send a message. Mostly, we try to keep things to a minimum when texting. We’re much closer now and I feel so much happier. Best of all, when we come home, it’s easy to put down the phone and have a real conversation because we actually have things to talk about. relationships,relationships,relationships